We all hear those really wise sayings from the moment we can remember things. "Fools rush in", or "don't count your chickens until your eggs have hatched", but it just kinda sucks because they never mean anything until you learn it firsthand. Or maybe it's just me.
What good is good advice, after all, if you're not going to follow it, hmm? It took me a long time to understand the meaning of the question, "How can anyone else love you if you don't love yourself?" Basically, I just kind of felt that it was bullshit, meaning in reality "Well, ya got no takers right now, so why don't you just work on being good at being alone?"
But it's not like that at all. It actually does mean something and three years after having come out, I kinda understand it now. The thing is... when you loathe yourself as completely as I do (yea, I'm working on it) you pass up all the people that ever truly cared about you.
I could count a dozen guys who might've stayed with me for a very long time had I not freaked out because they actually liked me back. I've noticed that whenever I meet someone I like and find they like me as well, I tend to lose interest. But it's not just the thrill of the chase crap. I came to the realization a couple months ago that I actually thought less of them because they liked me. It gave me the impression that they had bad taste in men.
And of course, when they didn't like me, it meant that they were healthy and smart and a good catch, because they deserved better and knew it. It's kind of a Catch-22 really. (Read the book.)
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